Wednesday, December 5, 2012

On the Fifth Day of Christmas

a) “The Christmas Gig” by Various Artists

Christmas compilations are cool. It's a chance to get a bunch of bands and artists together to give their own unique perspectives on the holiday. For bands that wouldn't usually put out an entire album of merry songs, compilations allow the opportunity to test the icy waters of Fa-La-La-Land and to accompany other equally-festive talents.

A couple of years ago, Target put out a string of commercials to celebrate their winter sales and products. Accompanying these commercials were original songs from bands like Guster, Bishop Allen, and Blazer Force. Whoever at Target decided it could be advantageous to release these songs, in full, to the public was a genius. This is possibly one of the most bizarre, scatterbrained collection of Christmas songs ever, but it's also one of my favorite. I don't think Blackalicious and Jenny O. would ever belong on any other compilation together, but I'm glad it happened here.


b) “Christmas Party,” “A Benihana Christmas,” and “Moroccan Christmas” from The Office (US)
First, my obligatory rant that the early seasons of the US version of The Office were the strongest, even though this final season is shaping up to be a decent send-off to the series. I can't fully explain why pre-wedding (even pre-relationship) Jim and Pam were better and how the degradation of the characters into gross caricatures wasn't the best route for the show to take. I don't want to be the person who says, “I liked the show before everyone started watching it,” but, hey...

Anyways, the first few Christmas episodes were always interesting because they were about something else, every season. Season 2's “Christmas Party” was about Michael trying to throw the best Christmas party ever, no matter how many people he upsets along the way. Season 3's Benihana episode was all about spite: Michael attempts to rebound from Carol while Pam and Karen throw their own party after Angela shoots down all of their ideas. And Season 5's “Moroccan Christmas” is a thinly-veiled but highly-funny intervention episode.

The strongest of the three is obviously “Christmas Party.” Jim's whole conundrum of his gift ending up with the wrong person is perfect and let's not forget that this was one of the first episodes that really started to flesh out the background characters and what they gave each other through Secret Santa spoke volumes about their interpersonal relationships. Toby got Angela a creepy baby poster because he knows she likes that kind of thing. Oscar gives Creed a shamrock keychain because he doesn't know anything about Creed except that he might be Irish, maybe? Creed got Jim an old shirt in a plastic because he forgot about the whole thing. Michael got Ryan an iPod because he's got some weird crush on him and because he got a big bonus from Corporate (“Three thousands G's...”). And Kevin got himself a footbath because that's just what he wanted.

In a sense, we all have that problem. It's not enough that you have to buy gifts for people. There's a stigma to know what the receiver wants, to get to the core of someone else through commercial means. It's tough, frustrating work to know all of these other people so deeply. Maybe we should just all be Kevin.

Then again, maybe we should take the iPod...


c) Salvation Army ringers
Today was the first time I ever gave to the Salvation Army. Well, it's the first time I've ever really given to charity in general. Sure, I've given a couple of dollars to homeless people throughout my years (to support the drugs and alcohol market), but this was the first time I've given a conscious thought to giving back. My contribution: $3.46 made up of change I had in my pocket.

Now, this may not seem like much coming from someone clearly as well off as I am. I mean, I'm a college graduate. Of course I'm just rolling in the dough right now (which reminds me that I should apply for a job at Panera tomorrow and really get some mileage out of this writing degree).

I can't help but feel for those guys, standing out front of Wal*Marts and Meijers with their dinky bell and their buckets, freezing and ringing away. They really have nothing to do besides tell entering customers “Merry Christmas” and tell exiting people “Fuck your selfishness” (under their breath). It's a totally thankless job and I can't imagine many ringers go to bed and think “I made $12 for someone else after standing around in the harsh weather for eight hours. Worth it.” I like the underdogs, though, so if getting rid of the three pounds of coins I was carrying around will help with... something... I'm okay with that.

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